Messanie Street Philosopher expounds on current events
By Alonzo Weston
Coming out of a Downtown bakery Tuesday, I saw Bag-Head Jheri, the Messanie Street Philosopher, walking aimlessly down Eighth Street. He looked dejected and deep in thought.
“What’s up, Bag?” I said by way of greeting.
“Hey Weston, got silly stuff troublin’ my mind,” Bag said shaking his head.
“What now?” I asked.
“For starters, howz Trump leading in the polls to get reelected president? Ain’t the man a criminal who led the Capitol insurrection on Jan. 6?” Bag answered.
“I know, it doesn’t make sense to me. Shaping up like him and Biden going at it for the presidency again,” I said.
“We don’t need no rerun of that. If Trump runs and loses, all hell gonna break loose again,” Bag said. “One’s approaching senility and the other’s a psychopath.”
“Not two good choices if it sticks,” I said. “But I’ll vote for anyone but Trump.”
“Make America great again? When were we great in the first place?” Bag said. “The past had racism, McCarthyism, assassinations and inequality all around.”
“We’ve come a long way, Bag, and we can make America greater than ever,” I said.
“Not when so many people still supporting Trump and his agendas,” Bag said. “And St. Joseph has drunk a whole gallon of that Kool-Aid.”
“Yeah, Trump flags and bumper stickers abound,” I said.
“And what’s this about one of the Capitol insurrectionists running for our school board?” Bag asked. “I thought letting Ken Reeder get on the board was a stretch.”
“Yeah, I know how Reeder was always against the district and every school levy and bond,” I said.
“Now they trying to get another bond passed in April and talking about a four-day school week,” Bag said. “Ain’t none of it gonna work. Kids need more schooling not less. Missing too much school as it is. And the road they’s going, ain’t nevah gonna get another bond or levy passed.”
“It’s gonna be rough. They keep shooting themselves in the foot. Another long-range plan? Didn’t they just do that a few years ago?” I asked.
“Parents got bumper stickers bragging about they child being a gifted student. Why not one that just says ‘my kid does not skip school,’” Bag said,
“Yeah, normal and on time is good enough in this climate,” I said
“Yeah, and one more thing. I’m glad they working on Lake Contrary and all, but residents in that area complaining about them using herbicide to kill the lake vegetation that’s grown up,” Bag said. “Those folks down in Kirschner-Purtell Addition have had enough poisonous groundwater from the nearby chemical plants. Now gonna add more poison?” Bag wondered.
“I trust the county is taking that into consideration, or I at least hope they are,” I said.
“Don’t know about common sense anywheres in this town,” Bag said as he sauntered off down the street.
